Sunday, September 18, 2011

The professor's exam

A student comes to a young professor's office. She glances down the hall, closes his door, and kneels pleadingly.

- "I would do anything to pass this exam."

She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, and gazes seductively into his eyes.

- "I mean," she whispers, "I would do *anything*."

He returns her gaze.

- "Anything?"

- "ANYTHING"

His voice softens. "Anything??"

She smiles mischievously, "Anything."

His voice turns to a whisper, "Would you . . . study?"

Alzheimer & Colour Test

Sit comfortably and be calm. This is a serious test, not a joke..
Put your thinking process aside - i.e. put your brain in neutral gear.

1- Find the C below. Do not use any cursor help.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO COOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

2- If you already found the C, now find the 6 below.

9999999999999999999 9999999999999999 99999999999999
9999999999999999999 9999999999999999 99999999999999
9999999999999999999 9999999999999999 99999999999999
6999999999999999999 9999999999999999 99999999999999
9999999999999999999 9999999999999999 99999999999999
9999999999999999999 9999999999999999 99999999999999

3- Now find the N below. It's a little more difficult.

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMNMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

This is NOT a joke. If you were able to pass these 3 tests, you can cancel your annual visit to your neurologist. Your brain is great and you're far from having a closerelationship with Alzheimer.

Congratulations!


Oh. One more test....
Find the 44th USA President.



Well, congratulations, you're not color blind either!

Sunday, January 23, 2011

The Silent Treatment...

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.

Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper:
'Please wake me at 5:00 AM '

He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.

Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.

The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'

Conclusion: Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests. :)

Friday, January 07, 2011

Pregnancy looks weird through the eyes of a kid


There's this 3 years old kid who's waiting with his mother in the doctors office.

The boy stares the belly of a pregnant lady who sits in the opposite chair waiting for her turn to see the doctor.

Suddently the boy stands up, walks towards the pregnant lady and asks:
- "Why is your stomach so big?"

She replied,
- "I'm having a baby."

With big eyes, the kid asked,
- "Is the baby in your stomach?"

She answered, "It sure is."

With surprised and shocked look, the kid said with a trembling voice:

"Then why did you eat it?"