Loch Ness monster attacks with humor

- What did the Loch Ness Monster say to his friend?
- Long time no sea.

- What do you get if you mix a fashion designer with a sea monster?
- The Loch Dress Monster.

- Which is the unluckiest monster in the world?
- The Luck Less Monster

- What do you get if you mix the Loch Ness Monster with a shark?
- Loch Jaws

Newly developed cloaking device - experiment gone wrong

An experiment took place two days ago in Nevada desert.
Scientists tested a new cloaking device and although the test was successfull, something went wrong.

The tests were performed on an ex-football player who's name wasn't announced. Investigation showed that the ex-player left the labs with the cloaking device and grabbed the chance to score in a football match, while the machine operated.

The goal was caught on video:

Antonio Lucio Vivaldi - Violin funny quotes

Antonio Lucio Vivaldi (March 4, 1678 – July 28, 1741)
In memory of this great composer we dedicate the following Violin funny quotes:


- How many second violinists does it take to change a light bulb?
- None. They can't get up that high!

- What's the difference between a violin and a viola?
- There is no actual difference. The violin just looks smaller because the violinist's head is so much bigger.


- What's the main differences between a fiddle and a violin?
a. No-one minds if you spill beer on a fiddle
b. A fiddle is fun to listen to.


The judge to the defendant:
- "You look familiar...haven't I seen your face before?"
The defendand:
- "Yes you have, your Honor; i gave your son violin lessons a year ago!"
..and the judge
- "Ah, Yes!...... 10 years!!!"